yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
