She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize