I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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