Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
