Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
