WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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