No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
