You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Randomize
