I just made out with a guy for $7.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Randomize
