what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Randomize
