ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize