i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
