I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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