I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
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