Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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