Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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