My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
