she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
