its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
