I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
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I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
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Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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