dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
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He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
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Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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