Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
