I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I think my moral compass just broke
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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