I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
