dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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