my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
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