I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Im part way to drunk.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
