He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize