Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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