You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
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