Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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