Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
