it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
