Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
