the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Randomize
