At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize