my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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