Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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