I hate your face
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
