New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Randomize