Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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