can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
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