Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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