mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
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