just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
