i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
