So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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