I'm really into asian looking animals
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Randomize
