You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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