think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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