Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
